And so, just as before, only by occupation in the day, by morphine at night, could she stifle the fearful thought of what would be if he ceased to love her.
It is true there was still one means; not to keep him--for that she wanted nothing more than his love--but to be nearer to him, to be in such a position that he would not leave her.
That means was divorce and marriage.
And she began to long for that, and made up her mind to agree to it the first time he or Stiva approached her on the subject.